"The Shack" and Papa

I don't quite know where to begin... What I am about to share is deeply personal and very fresh, but in writing this out I'm working to unpack what the Lord has given me.  I'm bringing you along for the journey, because I know I'm not alone in this. Your details may be different from mine, but the theme is the same.  None of us are exempt from the pain this life - in a sin-filled world - dishes out, and all of us need to remember that God is with us, loving us, in the middle of it. 

Recently Steve and I went to see the movie "The Shack", and it had a profound impact on me; as I write this there are many emotions and thoughts coursing through my system.  It's "just a movie" you may be thinking, and that is true, but I learned a long time ago that God can use whatever He wants to use to speak to those He wants to reach.   

There is some controversy surrounding the movie. After all, God the Father "Papa" is portrayed as a woman for most of it, but I truly believe that can be valid.  Let me explain a little (but this topic is not why I'm writing, so I'm not going to spend a long time here):  Genesis 1:27 "So God created human beings in His own image.  In the image of God He created them; male and female He create them."  I was just as much created In the image of God as my husband was.  The characteristics of my femininity are as much a part of God as my husband's masculinity.  Also, to say that God can only come to someone as a man is a short sighted persumption of one trying to know the mind of God - no one can know the mind of God.  He is so much bigger than we give him credit for.  Let me stop here and say, "I am not giving The Shack the weight I give God's Word", but I do believe it is a beautiful, fictional, again - fictional, story laced with the truths of how much God loves us and the lengths He will go to to bring us to Himself. After all, didn't the shepherd leave the 99 to go find the one lost sheep? In that movie theater He found me...

Sometimes when we are lost we don't realize it or, at least, don't want to acknowledge it.  I knew for a few months that something wasn't quite right, but didn't have the "get up and go" to figure out what it was that was wrong. I hadn't felt very close to God, even though I'd been doing everything right. I'd been reading His word and praying and going to church and serving His kids, but doing everything right wasn't making me better.  I'd wondered what was wrong, but didn't know until He met me where I was that day. 

As I was watching this man battle through the loss of his daughter, I started to realize that the grief I'd experienced (over things lost to me) had created a numbness, an indifference to God. I had worked so hard for Him, been obedient to His call, and loved His people only to have my dreams shatter around my feet. There is a line in one of the songs from the movie (Keep Your Eyes On Me) that says, "Ain't it the sinner who gets all the grace sometimes, ain't it the Saint who picks up the pieces left behind". When I heard those words I suddenly realized what was happening. I was holding a bit of a grudge (shocking, I know). After all my obedience, here I was standing in the middle of my shattered dreams taking in all the pieces laying around me, knowing they couldn't be put back together, and grieving deeply.  

In gazing, transfixed into my grief I was forgetting to keep my eyes on Him. I was lost inside the grief...inside the numbness. So, sitting in a movie theater, He did for me what He's done so many times before (because I am, afterall, a sheep, and sheep tend to wander), He came and got me.  He reminded me that what the enemy intended for my destruction He was going to use for my good.  Because He is good. Because He loves me. Because He is my Papa. 

I'm certain there is more I'm going to be unpacking as I (finally) read the book, but this is a good starting place. I'm so glad God doesn't give up on us. 

I know that this (my honesty with where I've been) may comes as a shock to some of you; to you I say this... I'm not perfect. Life beats me up sometimes; just as it does you. This life of faith is not an easy one, but I've not given up on it nor have I given up on the One who loves me best.  This, dear ones, is reality, and I share so you know that you are not alone.  When we are facing the harsh realities of this life it is essential that we keep our eyes on Him. He loves us more than we will ever be able to comprehend.